SIGNS YOU MIGHT BE A WEREBOT:↵-your joints make servo noises↵-strong feelings of kinship with computers↵-captchas are way too hard sometimes

To prevent an ice age, a solar mirror is shot into orbit. People report waking up in messes of computer parts, circuit traces on their skin

“You mean they invented large brains, tool use, culture, swarming and malthusian trap evasion AT THE SAME TIME? Who leaked the cheat codes?”

When you design a biosphere and carefully nerf all the obvious paths to superintelligence, but some social mammals discover it anyway

The first moon of this world wakes werewolves, the second zombies, and whenever a comet passes, it’s dragon season

It’s light, pliable and robust, the perfect material. The only downside is that it leaves a trail of reality rot, static, chittering voices

Nobody knows the glitchmold’s origin, but since it so effectively scrambles bullets and teeth, biosphere and tanks alike adopt it as armor

One of these nightmares, you kill the antagonist, eat his body. Your nightmares stop, but now that person you’re chasing has your face

Between the two mirrors, an infinity of mirror selves is lined up. But one by one, they wink out

Left on a stack of paper overnight, the book has extended roots: Mutated sentences snake over the sheets, curl around glyphs and diagrams

You land in the pool and its bottom falls away, edges recede to the horizon, and you float in a vast waveless expanse smelling of chlorine

as he gestures, a swirl of fog stirred up by his hands solidifies into a nautilus and drops to the ground with a clunk, startling him

Also, they’ll build perfectly adapted machines and move all the minerals to the surface - a turnkey solution! Just swoop in and take over!

Terraforming protip: Instead of sending your own bots (expensive!), uplift a local species. Their economy will do the rest.

One of the most common yet understudied cryptids, nobody’s ever seen anything of the text cursor except its head and footprints.

Trust not those who’ve heard the voice of God, any god. No prophet could perceive a whole world and not burst, no holy book could hold one.

Gods talk in worlds to convey meaning, not words. Pilgrims will travel them in sequence in the hope of understanding maybe one sentence

In case of trouble with time-travelling assassins, break a time crystal, the shards really mess with their engines. Basically time caltrops.

Ghost rain, soundless, neither wet nor cold, is falling right through our roof and clothes, running over our skins in ethereal rivulets

I’d like to report a defect, this storm is broken. It’s leaking water and the light is flickering all the time

a superintelligence serving as robot butler asking “Is this trad?”

In the end, the machines keep us around because we form part of their ancestral environment and they feel empty and rootless sometimes

Spring comes over the universe and the stars unfold interpenetrating plasma petals, the sky becomes a meadow through which comet bees buzz

To many small ground dwellers, flocks of sheep are just unusually mobile forests

Even the sun is only a very hot cloud.

using your alt to talk shit about the main so that you can take part in the gossip

Leave paradise, Eve parasite: The story of ingestion, infection, and following quarantine. Genesis 3, unknown author.

their struggle sometimes succeeds in making the soul miserable, disordered. Often though, they’re beaten back, recently even with chemicals.

Souls believe they are what they inhabit, but are in fact brain parasites and the actual human is the subconscious: Trapped, near-powerless,

a movie with decent-but-unknown actors, whose faces and voices are then in post-production replaced with those of hollywood stars

Survivors in the asteroid belt tell stories of Earth’s past civilizations, lost billions of years ago when its surface was submerged by air

These nuke complexes double as embassies, so the end game is that every embassy sits on a nuke large enough to destroy the city it’s in

Completely serious btw. The alternative is the people at the buttons waking up and realizing that they don’t need to preserve Earth to win

Being a threat to MAD back home, every Martian settlement has a well guarded earthling nuke placed at its heart by interplanetary law

“but who would lay out a struct that way” look, it was a six day rush job, ok,

But don’t end up like the last guy, who spilled a 1 and was cast out, with no way in again https://twitter.com/allgebrah/status/869328213692043264/photo/1

Live so that upon dying, your soul triggers a buffer overflow in heaven and your privilege bits are set to 0(CREATOR)

It is said he once won a staring contest with a surveillance camera

+++ advice to “read old books” and binge on fossil meme reserves pinpointed as cause of observed noosphere heatup +++

PETS & THEIR IDEAL PLACES BY PROFESSION:↵Raven: shoulder (seer)↵Parrot: same (pirate)↵Cat: lap (supervillain)↵Ouroboros: neck (demiurge)

Wear your pet ouroboros around your neck, for it confers protection against the outside world and also provides warmth

kids sitting in the school bus, sharing neural links like their parents once shared earbuds

[for reference: https://arxiv.org/abs/1705.03394 - while thorough, they didn’t have this idea]

After the host star has been converted into computronium, it enters summer sleep: Becomes dark matter and waits for a colder universe

although, if we can imagine something (specifically, find a construction), we also establish a causal connection, however tenuous

another way to put it: mathematical possibility of something (existence) versus its causal connection to us (relevance)

is occam’s razor still useful here? is terseness the most desirable quality here? could it be ok to just make shit up?

maybe some metaphysical answers are that way? you’d judge them by their pleasantness, lucidity, and usefulness as intuition pump

[musings]↵finding that something exists doesn’t mean it has to affect us - it could be in an entirely different universe, inaccessible to us

And how would a god prove its omnipotence? By doing everything that’s possible, everything that’s good but also everything that’s bad